WHY IT’S SOMETIMES GOOD NOT TO CHANGE

This week I received some lovely feedback from one of my clients saying how invaluable her time with me had been – and that as a result of it she’d decided not to change.  ‘Odd’ you might think – but you’d be surprised at how often I hear people say similar things.

It always makes me smile when I hear this because, of course, there has been a change – a change of mindset; a change of attitude; a clearing of the fog …… I could go on!!!  And it’s that internal change that’s the really important thing – the thing that will help you to know whether changing your job; relationship; lifestyle ….(again, I could go on!) ….. is the right thing to do.  Or not!

Or perhaps there has been an external change, but it’s something small that’s made a huge difference and helped you look at things differently.

Often when we are unhappy or frustrated with our work, relationship or lifestyle there is an instinct to want to walk away.  However, this is when you need to invest the time to really understand exactly what it is that’s making you feel that way.  If you don’t, then you are in danger of moving to a new situation only to find that…..

  • you have the same frustrations;
  • have taken the problem with you; or
  • you miss your old life!!

Let me give you some examples …….

I have worked with many people who feel they need to move job.  Sometimes this is totally the right thing to do – and sometimes it isn’t.

I recently worked with a lovely guy who dreaded going to work.  After allowing himself the time to reflect, it became clear that actually he loved where he worked, the people he worked with and the vast majority of what he did.  But, as he’d progressed in his career, he was now expected to give regular presentations – something he dreaded.  This fear was colouring his view of his job and effecting his confidence. By improving both his skills and his mindset about presentations he was, once again, able to enjoy his career – and is thriving in it.

Perhaps this is something that resonates with you?  A small part of your job (or life) that has become a huge problem.

I’ve come across so many similar examples.  The person who thought she hated her job, but actually it was the commute to work that was causing the problem – and as she could work ‘flexi’ hours this was really easy to solve.  Or the boss who, by learning to ‘let go’ and delegate, found that he had time to enjoy his business once again – and had a much happier and more productive team around him.  Once again, I could go on, and on, and on!!!!!

There are a whole host of other reasons why we may feel that we need to change an aspect of our lives – when actually we may not ……

Maybe you’ve become so caught up in the day to day ‘stuff’ that you loose sight of what’s important, or perhaps you forget to make time for yourself;

Perhaps you feel pressure to always ‘do more’ or progress in your career.  But is this what you actually want, or is it something that you think is expected of you?  Only by understanding your own values (and living a life that reflects them) can you be truly happy and fulfilled.

Or maybe you look at other people’s lives and think that they seem so much more exciting than yours.  But are they looking at you thinking how good you’ve got it!!! (social media has a lot to answer for!!!!! But maybe that’s a whole other blog!!!)

Whatever’s happening in your life it’s important to take the time to enjoy it, to live life to the full.  And if you want to change anything, make sure it’s the right thing – the thing that’s really going to make the difference.  The thing that will make your outer reality catch up with your inner dreams – and allow you to love yourself and your life.

To find out more about how you can make the changes that matter, contact me – just head to the contact page and drop me a note.